Caregiver guide
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The short answer
Most of this site is about your child. This page is about you.
Parents of children with disabilities have higher rates of depression, anxiety and post-traumatic stress. That is a clinical finding, not a character flaw, and all three are treatable. 1 2
The numbers, up front
- A free national hotline
- The National Maternal Mental Health Hotline offers free confidential support at all hours, on 1-833-TLC-MAMA 3
- Perinatal depression is treatable
- It is among the most common complications of pregnancy and the postpartum period, and treatment works 1
- Post-traumatic stress after a birth
- Post-traumatic stress can follow any event experienced as life-threatening, including a traumatic birth or a critical newborn illness 2
- Respite exists and is funded
- A national respite locator lists services by state, and many Medicaid waivers fund respite hours 4
When to ask for help
- It has been more than two weeks
- You cannot sleep even when your child sleeps
- You cannot enjoy anything
- You feel disconnected from your child
- You are having intrusive memories or nightmares about the birth
- You are avoiding medical appointments because of how they make you feel
- You are having thoughts of harming yourself or your child
That last one needs help today. In the United States, call or text 988, or call 1-833-TLC-MAMA. 3 These thoughts are more common than people say out loud and they are treatable.
Things that help
A birth debrief. A meeting with the team to go through what happened with the record in front of you. Many families describe it as the single thing that helped most with intrusive memories.
Treatment for post-traumatic stress. Trauma-focused therapies are effective. This is not something to wait out. 2
Your own postpartum follow-up. Postpartum care is meant to be an ongoing process rather than a single visit. 5
Respite. Someone else caring for your child so you can rest. Many Medicaid waivers fund it. 4 6
Other parents. Almost every family says the same thing: the people who helped most were other parents in the same position. 7
Asking for help specifically
People want to help and do not know how. Vague offers go nowhere. Specific requests get said yes to.
Jobs I could hand to someone
Examples: a meal on Tuesday. The school run on Thursdays. An hour on Saturday so I can sleep. Sitting with my child during one appointment. Collecting a prescription.
Who I will ask, and when
My own appointments
These are the ones that get cancelled first. Write them down and keep them.
Appointment / date / for what
Numbers to keep
- 988 for any mental health crisis, by call or text.
- 1-833-TLC-MAMA, the National Maternal Mental Health Hotline, free at all hours. 3
- My own doctor:
- My child's coordinator:
- Someone I can call at 2 a.m.:
Where these facts come from
- National Institute of Mental Health. Perinatal Depression. 2024. www.nimh.nih.gov/health/publications/perinatal-depression. Link checked September 3, 2026.
- U.S. Department of Veterans Affairs, National Center for PTSD. PTSD Basics. 2024. www.ptsd.va.gov/understand/what/ptsd_basics.asp. Link checked September 3, 2026.
- Health Resources and Services Administration. National Maternal Mental Health Hotline. 2025. mchb.hrsa.gov/national-maternal-mental-health-hotline. Link checked September 3, 2026.
- ARCH National Respite Network. National Respite Locator Service. 2025. archrespite.org/respitelocator/. Link checked September 3, 2026.
- American College of Obstetricians and Gynecologists. Committee Opinion 736, Optimizing Postpartum Care. 2018. www.acog.org/clinical/clinical-guidance/committee-opinion. Link checked September 3, 2026.
- Centers for Medicare and Medicaid Services, Medicaid.gov. Home and Community Based Services. 2025. www.medicaid.gov/medicaid/home-community-based-services/inde. Link checked September 3, 2026.
- Center for Parent Information and Resources. Find Your Parent Center. 2025. www.parentcenterhub.org/find-your-center/. Link checked September 3, 2026.